Dragonballs
by ChibiBlue
Summary: This is a parody of 'SpaceBalls', Im sure you've all heard of it. Im having trouble following the line so it'll be posted in chapters. Enjoy! ^_~
1. Default Chapter Title

Dragonballs

In a Galaxy very, very, very, very, very far away, there is a ruthless race of 

beings called Saiyajins. The fearless leader of this ruthless race has foolishly squandered

the priceless oxygen of his entire planet. Today is Princess Chichi's wedding day on the neighboring,

peace-loving planet Earth. Unbeknownst to the princess, but knownst to us, danger lurks in the stars above…..

If you can read this, you don't need glasses

"If only your mother was here to see this day." The Ox King sighed, two or three maids scurrying around him, straightening collars and flaring his daughter's vale.

The Royal Wedding of Princess Chichi was taking place, her hand in marriage being given to Prince Pilaf, the last single prince in the system (Pilaf was actually more of an emperor, but royalty was royalty when one was as desperate as the Ox King). 

The Princess wasn't exactly happy about her Father's decision, yet she had no choice in the matter. 

But making her father happy was all that mattered today. 

"Ten minutes to magic time!" another butler chimed in a heavy British accent, too cheerily for Chichi's short-fused temper. Although ten minutes seemed long enough, it took at least five more minutes to get everything settled, straightening collars, dresses, and tightening the flowered bun in the princess' hair. 

"Is everyone ready?" The Ox King stopped the passing second butler, his tone firm. 

The servant nodded promptly, preparing to suggest a drink before the ceremony, but, "No! Where's my maid of honor?" Chichi stopped him.

Upsetting Princess Chichi wasn't on the top list of priorities, and the maid of honor was immediately summoned. Almost instantly, the maid of honor weaved his way through the outside crowd of Earthlings, giving them all smiles before turning back to his Princess. 

"I apologize, Princess, I'm just so excited, I couldn't hold my grape juice!" He gave her another smile, ignored as always, and scooped her vale up, standing straight.

"Alright.." Ox King began, observing his minions, and smiling in approval as the organ began playing. "Let's go, all starting on the left foot!" he ordered, starting forward.

"Daddy…that's your right foot.."

"Just keep going!"

______________________________________________________________________________

The ship came to a slow halt in the edge of the Milky Way Galaxy, the impressively built green haired Saiyajin gazing into the stars with satisfaction. 

"Colonel Brolly." An officer got up from his seat, stopping in front of his commanding officer with a salute. "You wanted me to let you know the moment Planet Earth was in sight, sir."

"So?"

"Planet Earth is in sight, sir." 

Colonel Brolly smirked at his helmsman, nodding in approval. "You really are a Saiyajin. You know that, right?"

The Private nodded, grinning back. 

Brolly sobered up, straightening. "Notify Lord Vegeta immediately - "

"I already did that, sir. He's on his way right now."

Colonel Brolly was about reply, when the voice of another officer stopped him. "Make way, for Lord Vegeta!"

He stiffened. "All rise in the presence of Lord Vegeta!"

The rows of officers and Privates stood in attention, replying in one voice, "Lord Vegeta!"

The metallic door parted, the short, caped, muscular form making his way over the carpet rolled out for him, taking his place next to Colonel Brolly, scowling at all the lower warriors equally. 

"Lord Vegeta, we have Planet Earth in sight, sir." Brolly affirmed for the officer that had relayed the message to him. 

Lord Vegeta blinked, a small smile curving the sides of his mouth. "Good job, Brolly. I'll call the President."

"I already did that, sir. President Scrube knows already." The helmsman said proudly.

Vegeta turned to him, glaring. "What? You went over my hair?"

The man's face fell, backing up. "Umm…no….well…sort of…not over…a little to the side –" the helmsman's eyes widened in terror. "No! Not that!"

Lord Vegeta frowned, powering a small ki sphere in his finger tips and lowering his arm as well as his eyes. "Yes. That."

He lowered his hand even more, letting the beam sear the other man's *ahem…well….you know where*

Brolly watched in horror as Vegeta nodded curtly, looking into the visual wall in the bow of the ship. "Well where is it? I don't see anything." 

"We…we…don't have visual contact yet, sir, but we have it on our radar screen. Shall I activate it for you?" Brolly prompted from beside him, gesturing to the eastern wall. 

"Nah, forget it, I'll do it myself."Lord Vegeta shooed Colonel Brolly away, walking over to the screen and scowling at it. "What is this? It doesn't look like a radar screen! What's all that churning and bubbling?"

Brolly pursed his lips and made his way over as well, punching a button on the side and lowering a cup to its spout. "Ah…we call it Mr. Coffee, Lord Vegeta. Care for some?"

Vegeta nodded, indignantly. "Of course. You know I like to drink my coffee while I watch the radar." He looked the soliders over. "Everybody knows that!"

The rows of Soliders bent their knees and crossed their hands over their crotches. "Yes we do, Sir!"

Vegeta narrowed his eyes and took the cup of coffee from Brolly. "Good. Now that I have my coffee, let's watch the radar. Colonal Brolly." Brolly punched in a few commands and stepped back as the machine marked 'Mr. Radar' displayed the screen.

* * * *End Chapter One


	2. Chapter 2

Read this peeps/ Disclaimer:

Okay, note here:I do not write this lil story or whatever to get praise, okay? You people out there who are nagging me about plagerism and stuff are right. But you seem to think I'm doing this to make myself look good. IM NOT, PEOPLE. This is just a joke. My friend and I were watching Spaceballs one Friday and we thought, "Hey, what if the characters were the DBZ characters?" and that's how it gt started. 

We didn't sit there and plan, "Hey I bet we could be a real hit on FF.net! Yeah, lets go steal Mel Brooks' idea and make it our own so we can get good reviews!" Dears, we do this for amusement. If you think its terrible plageristic then DON'T READ it. This is to amuse people and my friends, not to make me look talented or special because im not really that way, ya know?

So before you go all legal and medevil on me, just think about this and don't read this fic. I'm doing it at my own leisure. To make people laugh, not to make myself look like a comedian. Spaceballs and the script Im using is all the genius work of Mel Brooks. I don't own any of it. None. Zero. Zip.

So consider all that up there before you go dissing me. Sheesh.

***sigh* **

** **

**Okie, Enjoy.**

* * * Begin Chapter Two

The organ's notes filtered through the entire chapel, uninterrupted until, "Daddy must I go through with this?" 

The organ came to an abrupt halt. Not a pleasant sound.

Ox King replied in a whispered hush, "I'm sorry, Chichi, he's the last Prince left in the Galaxy!"

Princess Chichi let out a heart broken sigh and continued walking down the isle next to her Father, the organ resuming as well until the two of them stepped up to the alter. The Princess turned her head to glance at her to-be husband; a short, _blue, bald_ little man (she could tell he was bald through that ridiculous blond wig he was wearing) with pointed ears, also known as the ugliest thing she had ever seen in her life. 

She gave him a polite smile, and he returned a tired one, yawning. 

Princess Chichi gave her head a quick jerk in annoyance and turned to face the alter. 

"Dearly Beloved." The priest began. "We are gathered here today to join Princess Chichi- what the?! Who is running _right_ past the alter…." 

Chichi never had time to hear the rest as she ran down the steps (feeling something tugging on her vale), out the door and onto the royal driveway. 

"Chichi! Honey, you forgot to get married! What are you doing?" The maid of honor sputtered, blue fingers still clutching the white silk of the Princess's vale. Chichi reached a pale silky hand of her own out and snatched the material so fast the maid of honor was also jerked into the vehicle.

"No questions, Zarbon, get in!" she hissed, climbing in and starting the engine, taking off seconds before the King and his court reached the driveway. 

"Chichi! Come back!" Ox King shouted, looking around angrily at his court. "Well don't just stand there! Get her! Stop her!"

___________________________________________________________________________________________

The Winnebago sped through the space silently. It was an older model, the light brown paint chipping off the sides and wings.

From inside the Winnebago, hard music beat from one end to the other, a tall Saiyajin warrior could be seen moving to the music. Long black hair cascaded down his shoulders and just barely touched well muscled thighs, all topped off with a dramatic widows peak. The warrior held a large bucket in his left arm, in his right hand a spoon. 

Broken bottles, old bowls and spoons lay scattered around the obsolete room. Bachelors. Go figure. 

The cockpit was no exception. Just as the back was, there were bottles and trash spread equally around the ripped seats and stained dashboard. The vehicle was programmed on auto pilot, the real pilot asleep in the seat.

From under thick black bangs accompanied by a cowboy hat, the man (who also seemed to have a _very_ impressive physique) looked nearly angelic, aside from the fact that he hadn't shaved nor bathed in days. 

The beeping from the com was enough to wake the innocent Saiyajin warrior up. He blinked, giving the com and tired glance, then sat up almost straight, yelling to his companion, "Radditz…_Radditz!_"

Radditz' ear's perked at the sound of his name. He grimaced and put his meal down, turned the music low, and listened again. 

"_Radditz!_"

The massive Saiyajin warrior scowled. "Always when I'm eating!" he puffed his tail out, stalking to the cockpit angrily, still holding a box of dog biscuits. 

"What is it, Kakarott?" Radditz growled.

"Radditz…" Kakarott croaked, pointing to the com. 

"What's that matter?" Radditz offered him a dog biscuit. "Hungry?"

Kakarott sniffed the dog biscuit and recoiled, wrinkling his nose and shaking his head. "No! No – just, answer that, will ya?"

Radditz shrugged and tossed the biscuit over his shoulder, then turned sharply enough to whack Kakarott in the face with spiked tail, then again when he turned to make his way to the com. Kakarott rolled his eyes and leaned back.

"Sure thing, Kakarott. I'll put it on audio so they can't see you." Radditz leaned forward and flipped a red switch, the display screen blipping on. A blue face appeared on the monitor, framed with tall white hair.

"Sorry, heh, wrong switch!" Radditz noted to Kakarott, who cleared his throat and looked up at Sauzza.

"Hello Sauzza. What do you want?" he asked, mockingly.

Sauzza smiled and shook his head. "No, no no, gentlemen. It's not what _I _want. It's what _he _wants." Sauzza turned to face his employer, smiling devilishly. 

"Paragus!" Both men exclaimed.

Paragus grinned, his brown skin dripping in melting butter. The psychotic Saiyajin had something about dripping butter and various vegetables off himself as a hobby. "It's simple, Kakarott. I want my money."

"Your uhh….your money, Paragus? Sure, we'll have it to you by next week!" Kakarott said brightly.

Paragus shook his head. "No Kakarott. I want it now."

"Now? 800000 space bucks now?!"

"No, Kakarott. You forgot late fees. Which brings your total up to….a million."

"A million?! That's unfair!" Kakarott sputtered.

"Tommorow or else." Paragus hinted.

Kakarott narrowed his eyes. "Or else – what?"

Paragus grinned, nodding to Sauzza. "Tell 'em, Sauzza."

The moniter moved to Sauzza's smiling face. "Or else Pizza is gonna send out for _you_."

Radditz glanced at Kakarott and laughed nervously, followed by the other Saiyajin himself. After seeing Sauzza pick a vegetable off Paragus and eat it, Radditz terminated the connection, and the laughter immediately ceased.

"Oh my God! One million space bucks by tommorow?! We're sunk!" Radditz cried from the co-pilots seat. 

Kakarott nodded, pointing to a blinking light on the com again. "Eh, just get that one."

"Kakarott! Captain Kakarott come in! Ox King to Kakarott do you read?"

Radditz punched the button. "Yes, Ox King." Kakarott replied distantly. "What is it?"

"Kakarott! My daughter, Princess Chichi, she ran away! You have to save her! I'll give you anything, you hear me? _Anything!"_

_ _

Kakarott and Radditz exchanged glances, then, "Anything?"

"Anything!"

Kakarott nodded, narrowing his eyes in thought. "Okay Kingy, we'll do it for….a million."

The Ox King's face went pale. "A _million_? Why you! There's no way – "

Radditz reached over, blinking innocently at the King. "I don't know your Majesty, we're losing the signal, you're starting to fade out.."

"Okay! Okay, just please, find her, bring her back!" The Ox King pleaded. 


End file.
